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Pulp Science Fiction: Samuel L. Jackson Cast as Captain Picard in Star Trek

Engage, Motherf*cka

Another Star Trek film is on the way, with Quentin Tarantino at the helm.  Tarantino, having tackled nazis, slave owners and Jennifer Jason Leigh, sets his sights on the final frontier.  Leading the Enterprise into space is none other than Samuel L. Jackson.


Star Trek is getting an edgy reboot.  Jackson states he is going to make Captain Picard a Bad Mother Fucker.  Test footage is available showing the captain asking an alien “Does Admiral Wallace look like a bitch?”.  Another exciting scene involves Picard aiming a phaser at a Klingon while shouting “English, mother fucker!  Do you speak it?”.  The USS Enterprise is expected to be painted yellow with the words “Pussy Magnet” displayed on the rear.

Tarantino’s Star Trek will star many of Quentin’s favorite actors.  Obvious casting choices are Christoph Waltz, Uma Thurman, and John Travolta.  Travolta auditioned for Commander Riker, but was passed due to his inability to grow a beard.


Quentin Tarantino himself will portray Wil Wheaton’s character.  It turns out that Tarantino has a fantasy that involves Samuel L. Jackson screaming “Shut up, Wesley” on the set of a Star Trek film.

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